At job #1 we have on video a recording of a scholar saying he wished the King James Version would go away (I’m being polite, he really said something more violent) because people do not understand it. He sites one (of many) examples, such as “And Adam knew Eve his wife…” which means they had sexual relations, not that they were vaguely acquainted. I think, though, there is something to be said for inference and nuance, for stretching at meaning. Is it so wrong that our minds have to search a little bit before coming to a conclusion? Helps knock the old grey matter out of the tired tracks it gets bogged down in
And reading the Bible will do just that for you. It will send you for a loop. It is definitely not a straightforward compendium of plain-spoken, well-mannered prophets endlessly lecturing everyone else on how to live their lives (that’s just Paul). People are people and in the Bible they behave very badly. There are naughty, vicious tales galore. My favorite of these is probably that of Jacob, Leah and Rachel, just because it is so timeless and heartbreaking. Leah, in short, was the dutiful wife who did everything right, but no matter what she did Jacob always loved her sister Rachel more. Impetuous, hot-tempered, selfish Rachel (in those days a man could have more than one wife- and a sister at that- without being arrested or castigated on Dr. Phil). It probably would have been better for Jacob if he could have loved Leah, but that was something he apparently could not do. For better or worse, his heart inclined elsewhere, and once it did that he could never be happy except to follow that inclination.
It has never been more perfectly put than in the book of Matthew, with some good advice besides:
Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal: But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal: For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also. (Matthew 6:19-21)
Was there ever anything more achingly poignant, and pointed, and perfectly phrased? Your life could be falling apart around you, but as long as you have something you truly cherish, what else matters?
I thought about offering up some comparative versions, but decided against it. It would showcase my argument but at the detriment of a lot of good people’s hard work. Their hearts were in the right place, and it is not for me to disparage what they accomplished.
The King James Bible is, of course, not always concise and inspired and brilliant, through little fault of the scholars. There are lists upon lists upon lists, as well as too many books by Paul. Ah, Paul. Usually, reading him, I feel like Eutychus (…pause for you to be impressed…), who fell asleep on a ledge while listening to our hero droning on for hours, eventually falling to his death.
But, thankfully, there is much of the King James Bible that is like this: a sample from one of the oldest books, Job:
Surely there is a vein for the silver, and a place for gold where they fine it. Iron is taken out of the earth, and brass is molten out of the stone. He setteth an end to darkness, and searcheth out all perfection: the stones of darkness, and the shadow of death. The flood breaketh out from the inhabitant: even the waters forgotten of the foot: they are dried up, they are gone away from men. (Job 28:1-4)
I cannot get over the use of such perfect, vivid language, and the King James Version of the Bible is brimming with countless examples. Put simply, this is the classic by which all others are judged.
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